Can’t Read My Poker Face

It’s true. He can’t read my poker face.

For Halloween I knew what I wanted to be since forever. And I’m not being sarcastic. Lady Gaga. Legit, right?

Word on the street had it that the ‘Mart had Lady Gaga Halloween costumes, but that’s just not how I roll. Every year when I was little my mother used to diligently sew my sister and I Halloween costumes. Felicity (the American Girl), a Southern Belle, Cinderella, Arwen (from Lord of the Rings…oh please, stop already), a bride, a 50s girl (that was a legit costume), and that’s all that comes to mind.

Freshman year of high school I made my Halloween costume: Belle from Beauty and the Beast. True to me, I didn’t use a pattern. Whoops. It still turned out okay.

Then Halloween stopped for a while til freshman year of college, when I threw on a bed sheet and a gold belt and called it a Greek goddess.

But I knew this year was going to be legit with the Halloween party in our apartment, and Lady Gaga was the perfect way to go. She’s got so many outfits to choose from, I had a hard time picking just one. Finally I settled on this one:


That’s right. Lady Gaga’s Red Riding Hood Outfit.

I started my costume search looking for a red leotard. Try finding that in October in adult size. A red bathing suit? Nah, not available in October, either. Hmmm…

Then I spied an extra long red maternity tank top at Target (why is it that I always find cute clothes in the maternity section there?). Perfect.

I picked up red wrist gloves, an official Lady Gaga wig (I had to), a half yard of red fabric, bright red lipstick, false eyelashes, and my friend’s dance tights.

Then I got to work. I tried to follow the old adage, “Measure twice, cut once,” but that really didn’t work out. It was a kind of wing-it thing.

The tank. I put it on (it could have been a dress), then measured and marked for the leg holes.

With half the leg "holes" cut out...

Leg openings fully finished and the crotch pinned.

Sewn and finished leotard.

Next came the hood. I was originally going to make it like a legit hood, but then realized it, after looking at the picture, that it was more like a tube than a hood. Great news for me; less sewing!

The hood fabric in all its glory...

Cut and measured hood...

Being a poor college student, I relied on my sewing kit for thread. Turns out red isn't a popular color. Hence the black thread.

I was super stoked about the whole thing and couldn’t wait to put it on for the party. At the party I got asked to take a picture with someone and got multiple comments, such as, “That’s the best Lady Gaga costume I’ve ever seen!”

Tell me if you think this is legit.

A RedOne...

I want your ugly, I want your disease...

Most epic Halloween ever.


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